this is what makes me smile everyday.

this is what makes it worth it.

this is what makes me love humanity.

thank you. thank you. thank you.

bookfails
Planning to do your part to help boost the declining publishing industry this holiday? Better check here first. Sure, there are plenty of folks who post glowing reviews of their favorite books. But what about the epic fails? Compose and/or discuss snarky, incisive critiques on the books you despise most.

foundphotos
Ever stumble across a frayed photo in your grandmother's attic? How about a faded picture tucked in the sleeve of an old novel at a used book sale? This is the place to post them. An amazing, eclectic collection of photographs sure to delight anyone with a penchant for history or nostalgic memorabilia.

note_to_cat
Having trouble conveying the concept of accountability to your cat? Now you can share letters to your significant felines and give public witness to your declarations of love and domestic negotiations. Whether you want to publish an apology for falling short on your cat-nip obligations or you need to raise a delicate hygiene issue.

because today is my birthday, i am banning the use of asterisks to denote actions

i havn't known what to write.

i've been a bit lost.

coming home hasn't been quite the homecoming i was expecting. my family has been amazing. the house totally rearranged for my comfort. everyone working around the clock to help ease the transition.

and its hard with everyone saying how glad they are that i am home. because i couldnt feel more differently.

i feel so much safer in the hospital.

when i hurt, i press a button and a nurse arrives and medication to instantly make me feel better. when i'm nauseous they fix it. when i panic, the nurses are there. the doctors answers questions. my friends are there around the clock. literally. we've grown comfortable there. my room didn't look like a hospital room. the wall covered in love from around the world. friends who stop by daily in between studying next door. a routine that i was used to...not used to, enjoyed. jackie with me every morning, justin sleeping by my side every night.

i got home and the journey home exhausted me so much that i slept for 2 days.

those that know me know that i hate sleep.

sleep terrifies me.

ever since my transplant when i slept for 6 days and almost didn't wake up.

i'm always scared that i'll just stop breathing. stop existing. lose control. let go.

so even though i guess my body needed it i hated sleeping for two days. two days and two nights.

today is the first day that i've really woken up.
and i still felt unsure of what to write.

but i just found out some news that has broken my heart so deeply that i don't know where to turn.

i feel so sad for my friend that i just dont know where to go and my blog is my way of understanding... of dealing....of trying to figure out the why's of life.

the world has lost a warrior.

Chad Warren

Chad has been fighting for so long.

and i do mean fighting.

Chad had cancer, for nine years and was the definition of Never ever ever ever give up

One of my close friends, Megan, has been by his side for the last couple of years and its her that i hurt for now. my heart just hurts. there is no other way to describe it.

and its awful but i am so scared that i see in her now what my family and friends might look like if i were to not make it and it terrifies me.

i gave chad and megan tickets to see 65_Redroses when it played at VIFF and they were able to make it out. and megan told me that it changed things for chad. it introduced him to the world of blogging and for the last month he and megan both have been writing in their blogs...

Chad's

http://www.chadwarren604.blogspot.com/

and megans

http://megansfairy-tale.blogspot.com/

and it has been a way for both of them to deal with a world that has become normal for them. hospitals and tests and medications and ambulances. things that should never be normal for 20 somethings. scary things. and they have both been so brave.

chad has been an inspiration of mine in his determination. his philanthropy. he has made a huge difference fighting myeloma, raising hundreds of thousands of dollars to find a cure.

megan has been an inspiration in her positive spirit. the girl can laugh like no other and can smile through a hurricane. she is the bubbliest, brightest, most positive person i have ever met and i give her so much credit. i knew her from high school and since then i have been honoured to get to know her better as she has been unafraid to visit me when times get tough. there are some people out there who just 'get it' and megan is one of them.

i havn't been able to write these last couple of days. never sure what to say and a little afraid of telling the truth. of letting people down.

but i can't be afraid.

i have to brave. i have to tell the truth. it's all i have right now.

so no.

i'm not glad to be home.

i miss the hospital.

but i am glad to be alive.

i am glad to have my family around me.

i am thankful for my friends who are here every step of the way.

i am so so so happy to be in love.

and i will not stop writing. i will not stop letting people in. i will not stop talking about what is it to be 25 and held back. 25 and waiting to live. 25 and begging for another chance.

please let me live again.

please let me walk. let me dance. let me breathe.

i will not stop fighting.
chad showed me how.

okay so i woke up this morning from the most realistic dream that had so many unrealistic elements, it felt like it was so very long, but i was only asleep for less than 3 hours.

( Read more... )

(i will finish laterrrrrrr)

Twilight really, really sucks. I find everything about it utterly retarded and annoyingly bad. Everything from the disgustingly airbrushed posters to the awful storyline and characters.

However, if you mention Twilight and I say "eww". That is not a personal attack against you, so please do not act as if it is. It is simply implying that your taste in movies/books is horrible to me.

I fail to see why people take it so personally when someone hates a movie they like.

I was fanatically in love with Star Trek in highschool. People often told me that Star Trek sucks and that it is for nerds. In fact, one guy walked up to me in the hallway once simply to tell me that Star Trek sucks.

Did I care?

No.

I shrugged and said "ok".

The point being, if someone hates a movie or fandom that you enjoy, it shouldn't matter to you. Everyone has different opinions on things, especially movies. And there will always be people who think that the movies you like are utterly retarded.

Accept that and your life will probably be a lot better.

And if it makes you feel better, feel free to tell me how awful all my favourite movies are. Chances are I'm not gonna give a shit.

Waking up next to you is the most wonderful thing I could ask for.

-Ace

Hello L.J. land!

This is Eva's little brother Hunter here just to let you readers know what is going on. Eva has had a tough time re-adjusting from the hospital. She has been sleeping a lot and hasn't been able to update. She doesn't want people to worry and will update as soon as she is feeling up to it! Untill then, I just want to thank everybody for the immense amount of support we are receiving, especially to those sending Eva mail. It is the highlight of our day here at the house when we open all the letters, also the wall of love is back up and growing in Eva's new room!
Thank you to the Hurds for the beautiful red roses
Thank you to Anissa for the bear
Thanks to Katie Walker for the pyjamas
And to Darren Klassen, yours is an offer we have only just begun to understand.

-Hunter Markvoort

Ps. for those of you who wanted to know Eva's Address:

Eva Markvoort
217 Third Avenue
New Westminster, B.C.
Canada
V3L 1L9

I finally saw the new Star Trek movie.

It was amazing.

I cried. I fansquealed. I approve.

I hate thanksgiving.

Worst time to have a work day, well, if you're on grave shift that is.

-_-

I just hate today. It's been a bad day. this week has kinda sucked.

Hormones and everything in between.

I need a hug.

I just read this:
http://www.drinkhacker.com/2009/11/26/review-akvinta-vodka/

Filtered through charcoal? That makes sense. Whisky is typically aged in charred barrels, and some types are filtered through charcoal (like Tennessee whiskey). It gives the product a more smooth flavour and imparts many subtle aromas onto it.

Filtered through marble? What? Marble is non-reactive. It's not gonna add anything to the vodka.

Filtered through silver? Well, silver is somewhat reactive, but once again I doubt it's gonna affect the flavour notably.

Filtered through gold? Again, a non-reactive substance. I don't see the point.

And platinum? Seriously? Like, really?

Wtf?

It really bugs me when I spend money on people and they act completely unappreciative.

Fuckers.

For crumfortunate


Anyonomous secret commission, it's plain so I know the receiver won't know. But I can't post the rest. :X



Also, a cuttlefish in progress.

As this day draws to a close, I realize that I have a lot to be thankful for.

I am thankful for:

Skywolf: He's the BEST thing that has ever happened in my life. He makes me laugh when I'm down (and even when I'm not), and has never put me down for anything. He puts up with my bursts of random weirdness, and counters with his own. He loves me for who I am, not for what he thinks I should be. He loves me for all my flaws, and never puts me down for them. For that, and so much more...I love him with all that I am. <3

Sky's family: They accepted me and my son from day one, made us feel like we were part of the family.

My kids: they can be PITA's sometimes, but I wouldn't trade them for anything. <3

My sister: she's always stuck by me, and loved me even when I was a brat. <3

My friends: I love you all! <3 I am thankful that I know you.

My extended "family" on WH: You guys are so great, you don't even know how much. I appreciate you all more than I can ever express.

great news!

i am home!

the two weeks of antibiotics is up and there is no real reason to be in the hospital any more.
there's nothing they can do here that i can't do at home.
i have home oxygen already set up so the discharge is easy.


two weeks.

a lifetime.

i have spent two weeks in one tiny room. i haven't left. my only connection through the mail my parents bring from home, the internet connection on this screen and the smell of rain fresh on the gortex brought in from the cold outside.

and somehow... i have seen more of this world from my hospital bed than i think could be possible by traveling.

all of the people who sent me cards and letters and packages... reaching out. giving me a bit of themselves. connecting. caring.

giving a shit.

i have grown while laying down.

i have traveled while staying still .

i have learned while not doing anything at all.

i am in such awe of the world.


i seem to ask questions of the universe and somehow the answers reach me. maybe i see answers where others might not. i don't know.

i just feel so lucky. so open to new ideas. so full of love.

i am a different person than two weeks ago.

thank you.

i am not alone.

i can't explain how much this means to me. how overwhelmed i am. how touched by kindness.

Tweaks and enhancements

1. In order to improve site security, we've temporarily suspended the ability to change passwords for old email addresses that haven't been used for over six months. For further information and support, please visit our customer care page.
2. We've launched a new mobile site with an enhanced UI at m.livejournal.com. View spotlights, post to your journal, read and post to friends pages, and more, no matter where you roam! Please let us know what you think, since this will eventually replace our existing mobile interface. You can update your mobile preferences on your account page.
3. We've upgraded from Beacon to Facebook Connect to improve dual posting. If you've already signed up for Facebook Beacon, you're good to go. If you wish to update your Facebook Connect setting, visit Account Privacy settings and scroll down to the option labeled: "Send information about my updates to Facebook." You can choose Always or Ask each time. Remember to save (on the bottom left corner of the page). To learn more, check out FAQ 249. While we're on the subject, if you happen to be visiting that side of town, please join our Facebook fan page for a touch of home away from home.
4. You'll now receive the Writer's Block Question of the Day in the body of email notifications. To sign up for Writer's Block notifications, visit writersblock and choose the Watch Community option. Next, update your Writer's Block notification settings by checking the box to the right of "Someone posts a new entry to writersblock."
5. Paid and permanent users can now view, add, and edit Notes of commenters. Notes will appear beside the username of comment posters (instead of stars) on S1-themed comment pages.

Send some lovin' thanks to your friends with our holiday vgifts!

Photos of the week

We're so delighted with the immense talent of our growing, global lj_photophile community that we've decided to introduce a poll. Each week, we'll choose a half-dozen photos (based on user comments and staff feedback) and ask you to select a photo of the week. The winning photo will be announced in the next newsletter. If possible, please limit photo size to 350x350 to ensure that images display properly on friends pages. We want to thank you again (and again!) for sharing your passion.

Check out this week's photo poll and more fantastic user content after the jump!

( Read more... )

Curtains

Thanks for joining us. To our American friends, have a fantastic Thanksgiving. To all of our international neighbors, we'll eat a little extra for you!